“When I Was Little” brings hope to LGBT young adults

Students+Who+Are+Not+Silent+Core+Members%2C+general+members%2C+visitors%2C+and+guest+speakers+gather+together+for+a+group+picture+at+the+event%2C+When+I+Was+Little.+Photo+by%3A+Samantha+Winiecki

Students Who Are Not Silent Core Members, general members, visitors, and guest speakers gather together for a group picture at the event, “When I Was Little.” Photo by: Samantha Winiecki

Lisa Lilianstrom, Staff Writer

When Lori Clark, professor of English at Elgin Community College, was growing up in Illinois, she did not even know what “gay” was. The term wasn’t even on people’s radar back then. While many said comments such as “the volleyball coach is gay” and “the band director is gay,” many did not know what the word gay actually meant. Clark grew up in a different time back when lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer people were not very well known.

“It wasn’t until the 80’s when I was watching the news with my grandma and a story about AIDS came on. They were talking about gay men, and I said “what does gay mean?” and my grandma was like “well its two men who love each other, and two women who love each other “and I was like “ok whatever,” said Clark as she told her story to the audience.

Students Who Are Not Silent also known as SWANS put on an event called “When I Was Little.” When I Was Little was a seminar in which five adults, including Clark, all part of the LGBTQIA + community shared their experiences on what if was like growing up in a different time. Most spoke on the topic in which being gay was still considered taboo and as well as giving some advice to the new generation.

For SWANS Vice President, Alex Dominguez, the event showed how much everyone overcame back then but there is still more to do.

“I think the LGBT+ community has overcome so much over the past century. We’ve made so much progress and there is still more to be done,” said Dominguez.

One of the key things that the speakers spoke about was that it was not as accepted back then than it is now. Many claim that this is why some of the older generation may not be as open-minded to the community.

“I think, back then, people didn’t want to believe that being LGBTQIA+ is real. They didn’t want to acknowledge that there was anything other than heterosexuality. That’s why the previous generations are not as open-minded to multiple ideas of sexuality as us millennials are. Now, most of the world, have accepted the fact that there are other lifestyles than the ‘normal’ heterosexual lifestyle,” said SWANS Secretary Avery Johanson.

J.D. Harshbarger works as the Community Outreach Coordinator for the Open Door Clinic and was president of GLOBES (which is what SWANS used to be known as), fellowship officer for Phi Theta Kappa and a member of the College Programming Board while attending Elgin Community College.

Harshbarger grew up in a small town in West Virginia in a Methodist family. He admitted that his mother always taught him and his family to always fight to protect the beings in this world that needed help the most.

“The basic instinct that I took from this was to fight for the oppressed and to retaliate when needed,” said Harshbarger on his reasons for activism.

Ann Ordonio is a manager of Merchant Operations at the Sears Holding Corporation. Ordonio spoke about her experiences in high school and the difference between both decades.

“There were no clubs like SWANS, there was no support group, no PFLAG, there wasn’t anything like that,” said Ordino on the lack of support groups.

ECC Wellness Professional Vincent Cascio knew he was different from the other boys because he had crushes on them. One particular childhood moment he mentioned was when he watched Power Rangers.

“I was obsessed with the Pink Ranger, but not because I wanted to be a girl, but because I wanted to get Tommy to kiss me because he was very cute and charming,” said Cascio.

Cascio admitted that he felt alone because didn’t really have someone to look up to which is part of the reason why he feels that resources are important.

“It is important that we have a resource and safe space and an opportunity to answer any questions that students may have. There were so many questions I had growing up and I wish I had something like that,” said Cascio on why he does Pride Talk and Safe Zone Training.

Dr. Caryn Andrews is a police officer for the West Dundee Police Department. Andrews knew that she liked girls when she was younger when she admitted that she thought she had to be a boy in order to date girls.

“I started looking at books and saw the word “homosexual” and I thought ‘Hey, that’s me.’ It made sense. I never had an issue with my gender, I didn’t want to be a boy, I just thought I had to be in order to like girls so that completely changed my perspective on who I was,” said Andrews.

When Andrews came out to her parents, her dad was easier on her, but her mom ended up kicking her out and then she didn’t have anywhere to stay.

“I slept on park benches. At the time, my best friend was the manager at Little Caesars, so I got to sleep there at times. However, I couldn’t go to her house because she couldn’t be out, and I had a volleyball coach who was gay and lived with her wife but they couldn’t have me, because she was a teacher and could get in trouble,” said Andrews on her struggle to find a place to sleep.

After everyone shared their stories there was a mixer, where attendees got to chat with the speakers more on their experiences.

For Harshbarger at ECC they didn’t really get a lot of support.

“With the group that we had back then, we were very scarce there wasn’t a lot of us, we didn’t really have a lot of organization and whenever we wanted to go to the board of Elgin Community College they didn’t really want to do a lot with us besides let us have our club and organization and SWANS has more of a presence then we did back then,” said Harshbarger on how the LGBT clubs were different then and now.

One of the main reasons that the event was put on was to let the younger generation know that they are not alone and that there is a truth to growing up, happily, out and LGBT.

“I really hope that they can get a sense that they’re not alone. I’d want them to understand that they are capable of overcoming the obstacles that come along with being LGBT+,” said Dominguez.