Life & Culture

Remembering those impacted by domestic violence

Shantel Lewis, Staff Writer

November 17, 2025

De’Shawn James, three, lies on her mother’s shoulder while at a relative’s house in 2003. James, now 25, laid her mother to rest this fall. Her mother died from domestic violence.

Do you know the signs of domestic violence?

Is it black eyes, swollen lips, and broken wrists? Or none of those?

“I didn’t realize the signs,” said De’Shawn James. “Maybe if I did, my mother would be alive today.”

The 25-year-old lost her mother to domestic violence last month.

October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month, and ECC is holding a candlelight vigil, Oct. 31, to conclude the month.

According to a 2018 study by Refuge, a national charity for domestic violence victims, nearly two-thirds of women have experienced “toxic” or “problematic” behavior that constitutes abuse.

“I saw the unhealthy change in her,” James said. “She stopped coming around, stopped checking in on me. She fell through on promises.”

“I grew angry and stopped speaking to her,” James said.

James’s mother was shot several times and killed while sitting in her car. She was outside her home in Gary, Indiana, on Sept. 20.

“I regret how I handled that because now I don’t get to say I’m sorry. I don’t get to apologize,” James said.

The forthcoming vigil is meant to commemorate individuals like James’s mother as well as raise awareness among the ECC community.

“You never really know who’s experiencing it,” said Gema Atta, Student Life Coordinator, “Or victims may not realize they’re involved in one, so it’s important to raise awareness about such violent relationships.”

The vigil, which is a decade-plus tradition, will be held from 5:30 p.m. to 8:30 p.m. in the Seigle Auditorium. It is held in partnership with the Community Crisis Center, one of the oldest domestic violence shelters in Illinois.

According to a 2020 article in the Academic Journal of American College Health, 31.38% of two-year college students have experienced physical abuse, and 18.27% witnessed this.

Students can demonstrate support and raise awareness by wearing purple, the designated color for domestic violence.

Although Amanda Jackson, an ECC student, knows October is Domestic Awareness Month, she doesn’t know specific signs of domestic violence.

She said, “But, I know if my friend switches up her normal routine and isolates herself, then something is going on.”

Domestic Violence

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About the Contributor

Shantel Lewis, Editor-in-Chief

This is Lewis’ second year at ECC majoring in Education. Lewis joined the Observer because of her love of writing, podcasting and having meaningful conversations. The Observer provides her opportunities to perfect my writing skills, connect with others, and public speaking. Lewis is interested in covering student life as well as what’s going on in the world. She hopes to achieve fluency in AP style writing and graduate with the skills of a remarkable journalist. Her motto is simple and one that she likes to live by and that’s being the change you want to see in the world, and shine bright while you’re doing it. Contact Information: [email protected]